Silver Linning

Glad at least there's a silver lining amongst all the dark clouds....


Things are looking up at work, relationships between me & the rest of the product managers are improving (which really helps when it comes to work!), the team are starting to get the hang of things around... despite being severly short-handed right now, projects are coming in & going out almost as usual, my filing & documentation are almost complete (which leaves me more time for more proposals...), everyone seems happier in the new office ( people actually started saying Hi & Morning nowadays.... some whom I didn't even know are in the same company last time before we shifted.)

Seems good. A better future?

Let's hope so!

fool

Never felt so betrayed, so used before... I'm beyond pissed.. Don't even know what to feel right now. Been taken for such a long ride...

Disgusted. Totally.

This must be the final nail for the coffin....

New Dawn

Dawn on this day signifies more than just a new day. It’s a new beginning.

Today, I started work officially in my new office.
Today, I can oogle a half naked ladies during office hours! (Thanks to my pool view seat!)
Today, I got a new mobile (She’s absolutely gorgeous!!)
Today, I got a new mobile line (My first change in number since I 1st got my line more than 10years ago!)


Check out the babe in bikini! hehhe

My messy table... still unpacking.

Isn't she sexy? My new E900 touchscreen baby


Look! Same tee, same jeans, same coloured shoe! We didn't plan this, ok? Hahaa...



Today is the day I finally left the past behind & moving ahead.




A new beginning, a new start, a new result, a new future =
A better beginning, a better start, a better result, a better future!






I hope I won’t look back though....










Calling for Life...

Can somebody bring me a life???

It's now 12.51am, & i just reached home from office..... on a saturday night!!!

I need a life.


Anyone could spare me some?

Farewell Mr Cloud

Today marks a new beginning. Our stuffs are packed & ready to go.

All of us at Kobian fondly bid farewell to our old office as we have a spanking new nest 35 floors below.

We'll all miss the spectacular view, the unmistakenly cold feeling as you stroll down the aisle every morning.. 30 mins late, the warm rich tone of the wooden interior deco, the pantry that can rival Equinox in terms of view, the freezing temperature whenever it rains, the drifting of water vapour (looks very much like clouds to me) right in front of my desk, the many birthdays & various celebrations we had in our cosy little studio... & of course, the late nights clicking away at my desk as I watch Singapore's skyline coming to life with lights as it turn from dusk to dark and also, the endless stream of lights streaming across ECP as I sit alone in the pantry, sipping espresso after my work.

Sad. Sad to leave but excited about our new place too. It's a huge difference... 1st of all, there's RED everywhere!! I feel like I'm working at the River Hongbao planning office! 2nd, super bright yellow dominates a significant portion too. ( can you visualise now? Red & Yellow!!) (<-- yes, it's this red & yellow!)

But, frankly... It's pretty nice. Bright & cheerful... Well, hopefully I won't have to drag my ass to work every morning now!

Oh, oh.. the best part... In return for sacrificing my view of the Singapore Skyline... I got a pool view now! Hehhee.. Bikini babes beware!! Hahhaha...

Will post pics soon!

someone

Pretty sad to know that when are you down, there's no one to turn to, when you're lost, there's no one to seek advise, when you're up, there's no one to share your joy, when you're stress, there's no one to talk to.

Made me wonder sometimes... friends though are important, but when it comes to sharing of intimate ups & downs of life, can you really turn to them? Do they have the time? Most importantly, will they understand?

I guess life just isn't complete without a soulmate. Someone to share each other's joy, laughter, tears & sadness. Though it may be painful at times, with different views & opinions... looking back, somehow it seems complete.

A happy & fulfilling life may not be one filled with riches... but one that appreciates what you already possess.

I see my bank acct balloning week by week... but somehow, I was happier before. Hiazzz..

It's now 10.13pm... & I'm still in office. Guess it says alot of my current life... ... ... ...

Lifefull



It's now 9.35pm.. as I watch the opposite tower's light going off 1 by 1.. Hiazz.. I'm still starring at my PC.

Guess I should really get use to this kinda life from now on.. Not too bad, I comforted myself. At least, the time is all mine to schedule. (not that I have much programs anyway.. it's all work & home, work & home)

No life? In a way.. ya, but at least I've got a clearer direction now. I'm working towards something that I can see some returns.

Relationships are finally taking a back seat. No longer my piority. (Strange... this is something I never thought in a million years that I would utter.) Hmm.. unless someone special comes along... but that's another story.

Anyway...

With God's help, I'd not only work my way up... but I'll FORCE my way up! (Ethically of course! I hate politics!) hahaha.. so, upper management... beware!!

These few weeks has been a whirlwind of activities.. still trying to find my way around many expectations & job requests, finding contacts, dividing my time between work, delegation, emails, printers, suppliers, vendors & most recently... the big shift to my new office this coming Friday.

When will I settle down finally....??

Be saying farewell in 4 day's time to the view that lure me to this job. Hiazzz... what a pity.
But change is inevitable, let's just hope it's for the better.. A new office, A new beginning!!

GO ahead.. drool at the view!


Rainy Tuesday..


Night View.

CS

To cs.. I know u do drop by pretty often. Regarding the 'dessert', I'm sorry... guess I still can't accept strawberry sundae right now. Been having hot fudge for so long.. maybe my taste is just too used to it already.

Well, the apple pie is not bad too.. why don't u try that? But seriously, we could still have fries, ya?

foolish

I've had it!

Certainly doesn't pay to be nice or kind... That's it. If it's a bastard you want... it's what you're gonna get!

Ears & eyes are all around. I'm no fool.

In need of a trustworthy ear...

Hiazz.. feel so bottled up some times... I've so much to tell but I can't say anything.


Damn. It's hard keeping it all in.


Checkpoint 2006

Time is really flying past... in a twinkle, 2007 is just slightly more than 3 months away and most importantly, I'll be 27 in just a few more months.

What have I achieved so far? I found myself asking that ever so often. Just as often, I arrived at the answer of what have I lost so far...

What I had lost...? Too many. Some were really precious and irreplaceable... The pain still lingers now. But thinking back, I know for everything that I had lost... I had tried my upmost to hold on to it & to still loose it despite all the efforts, I know it's not meant to be mine and most importantly, I've gain valuable lessons.

I've learnt to appreaciate all the things I once possess & to learn from all the past mistakes to make sure that they are never to be repeated ever again.

You know, in life... everyone knows that no one is perfect. Right?
But somehow, people will tend to forget that & expect perfection from you. Humans are afterall... just humans. Inperfection is what makes people so interesting... do you think so? I mean, if everyone is perfect... it'll just be like "Pleasantville".

One word. " BORING"

To me, I can accept almost any mistakes... so long as the mistakes are learnt & effort is put in to correct it. In fact, making mistakes & learning from it is better (which shows you are improving) than not making any at all... which of course means you're perfect which also means you're God. ( coz no one is perfect... remember?)

Hmm.. think I've drifted away from my topic.


Anyway...

Now, looking back at the past 26yrs or so... I'm pretty proud of my achievements so far. Though I didnt earn as much as I want to or become as good in my work as I hope to be, I know I've been working my ass off & I tried hard.

For the past 2 1/2 years of working life... I've seen, heard & been through pretty much. Bad bosses, bad management, bad colleagues, backstabbing, stories after stories, petty little games.. the so-called office politics.

Having been mixed in the middle & emerge unscathed... I've learnt not to take sides or to participate in it. Just keep my eyes ahead, do my job... lend some listening ear but keep my mouth hidden away... you'll be just fine.

Compared to others, some my age, some even younger... they're millionaires, bosses & senior management... my achievement pales in comparison. But envy or shame, these 2 emotions are not in my dictionary. Yes, i do look up to these highly successful people whom have already made their mark in society at such as early age. I respect them.

Though my so-called 'achievements' so far is 'peanuts' compared to them, I take great pride in my little successes. And without a doubt, it's only 'when' I'll join these people, not 'if'.

Working life is no bed of roses, even if you are the boss. Trust me, I know~! But be proud of what you do & at the end of the day, the sense of achievement far outweights any monetary benefits.

Of course, almost everyone works for $$$.. even me. But there will come a stage where increment are no longer as important as advancement.

With advancement comes more work, more reponsibilities, more stress and more pressure... but it also brings to you more value... ...which in invaluable.

So, in my 26yrs... I've learnt to create more value to myself. I no longer see myself as just a designer. I want to be more, much much more than that.

Before I turn 28... I've set a goal to DOUBLE my existing value! It's no easy task... but I believe anyone can achieve anything if they set their mind & heart into it.

From the day I enter the workforce, I've managed to attain all the major goals which I had set for myself despite all the obstacles & negativity. So, with that, I declare I'll reach my 'goal 2008'... I'm certain about it.

Hold me to it. If I fail then.. whoever that can remind me about this post will get an exclusive & elegant 5-course dining in the costliest restaruants in town!

Hahhaa.. so, there I said it!! No turning back for me now.

Stormy weather...

Been so tired physically & mentally that I practically steer clear of my computer when I reached home for the past week. Been staring at the monitor for 12hr days... I can almost feel my brain cells are converting to circuit chips as the seconds ticked by...

Tired, stressed, with no one to turn to...


Life is not very fun right not...
Despite all... I can't stop, I can't move back.... the only way is up. Guess it's time like this that really moulds a person. I'm not sure how will I turn out at the end of this journey... but the only assurance I can give myself is... When I reached the end, and I look back.... I know I tried & I'll have no regrets.

I always believe this in life.... " It doesn't matter that you failed, it's failing to try that really matters. "

Looking ahead.. I see many bumps, many obstacles, many storms... expect & anticipate problems, you'd won 25% of the battle, have confidence & believe in yourself... another 25% is won.

So, before any battles... half of it is already won... if you really wants it.


Lastly.. don't be afraid of a storm.. embrace it. make use of it.




Speaking of storm, last sunday...as usual I was at the beach.. & guess what I s
aw!

It's a mini typhoon... commonly called a water sprout. From the news.. the last time this occurs was more than 5 yrs ago and it last for only about 5 mins..!

Cool...

National Day

Yesterday, 09 Aug was our little yet big nation's 41st birthday. Very young in comparison but what we had achieved in a mere 41 years is nothing short of remarkable.

Contary to many beliefs.. ours has definitely nothing to do with miracle or luck. It's through sheer hard work, countless time spend toiling, sweating & shedding of blood and tears that our fore fathers had managed to turn a sleepy fishing village name Temasek into a gloablised model city state that numerous other countries are still trying to emaulate.

As such, on this day... I stand proud as being a "Made In Singapore" product! This term... just over 2 decades ago meant nothing to the world. But in a mere 20 years, most product are proud to display a "Made In Singapore" brand.

This brand has come to stand for quality, trust, design & value. Rising to the level of "Made In USA" & "Made In Japan" brands..

But with so much pride of being a Singaporean, sad to say... Singaporeans are not the model citizens.. the behaviour of some are even worse than many Third World countries.

Take the NDP 06 for instance... moments ago, every single soul in the stadium has merge into a single Singapore Spirit, touched & moved.. many (even our overseas friends) sang our many national songs & recite our national pledge with such sincerity & pride.

Minutes later.. after exiting the stadium. The ugly Singaporeans rear its ugly heads. A war could have broke out at the carpark. No one giving way to nobody, incessant horning, tempers flaring.. all seems to have forgotten just moments ago that they all are smiling, laughing, clapping, singing as ONE PEOPLE.

Sad.

Here's some fireworks pic I took on NDP eve, Serene & I were along the Marina park waiting more than 1 1/2 hrs just to catch a 10 min show.. hahaha..


enjoy...

























Dawn...

Taking an infant step out of the nest... I now see the trees are staggering, the plants are flowering, the pasture are endless, the river are brimming with life.... the rays of the sun offering a warm welcome.

=)

Finding...

Haven't been in any mood to blog lately... still struggling to find a direction, a purpose & most importantly... which must I focus on....

So much has been happening lately that I suddenly found myself lost... and without any maps or GPS.. finding my way out is even harder.

Along the way.. I've received many advises & support but still fails to give me a clear direction to exit this jungle.

But I'm getting there... I can feel it.



Doors have been opened, some had closed.. I shall not let anymore slip by.

Announcement!!

Hey people... I've just created my very own blog link. It's just on the top right, simply copy the text & paste in your blog... and viola! U can link me!

If you wish for me to link u as well, just drop me a line & tell me your favourite colors so I could do a cool button for your link! :-)

I feel so down.

Guess the numbness has worn off. The pain has started creeping in..

Hiazz..

Tom

Feel like telling you guys a story...
(Hmmm.. let's use 'Tom' again shall we?)

Tom is a infantry soldier currently in enemy territory. As Tom and his platoon move through the heavily forested jungle, suddenly they were ambushed!

Totally surrounded & seriously outnumbered, all his fellow soldiers dropped their weapons & surrender, even his commander too.

Now, Tom being a stubborn old fool... his never-say-die spirit insisted that he MUST not surrender, MUST not GIVE UP! Although Tom knew the odds are stacked up so high against him that it would take a miracle to overcome this adversity.

Despite knowing its risk, Tom decided to hold on to his HOPE.

He armed his weapon.

He charged forward towards the enemy.

The enemy commander (let's call him "EB") was shocked. "Is he nuts?" he thought to himself. The rest of his troops just watched on....

As Tom approaches, EB fired a shot.

The bullet planted itself deep within Tom's left knee. Tom was in great pain. But he continue charging.. still holding on to HOPE.

EB was stunned. EB's troops felt sympathy for Tom. His courage, his beliefs touched them.

Another shot was fired. Tom was hit in the the right knee. Crippled, many thought that was the end. But not Tom, he crawled forward, leaving a trail of blood.. blocking out the intense pain from his wounds. Still holding on to HOPE.

At this point, all the soldiers present except EB felt for him. Persuading him to give up & not continue anymore. But to no avail.

After some distance, EB fired the 3rd shot. Tom felt a sudden numbness in his left hand. Thick red blood soon starts gushing from his left bicep.

Left with only 1 hand now, Tom struggled to stay awake, struggling even harder to move on. Still holding on to HOPE.

The 4th shot pierced the silence of the jungle. Tom's gun was flung from his right arm. Tom fell.
All his four limbs are now crippled.

Watching in disbelieve, the soldiers are glad that it's finally over.

Suddenly Tom flipped to lie on his back... using his back now, he inched forward. still holding on to HOPE!

The troops stared. Speechless.

EB walked over, pointed his gun.

Tom, now staring directly into the barrel of EB's gun. EB moved downwards, aiming the gun directly at Tom's heart.

It was all over in less than 1 sec.


Holding on to his belief & HOPE, nothing could stop Tom, no amount of pain nor hurt nor obstacles nor adversity except ONE. His heart. The only way to stop Tom is a wound aim DIRECTLY at his heart, giving him no chance of survival.


Tom had died.



But he died without regrets, knowing he tried not ONLY his BEST.. but exceeded any expectations that was set forth.



Part2.
To be continue...

I really hate this year.

Damn it!


I've read about stories like this in books & news but to see it happening to me... damn. Feeling so fucking lost.

Blow after blow.. I can't even begin to describe it. What could possibly go wrong in a guy's life had just went wrong... love? work? career?

Other than health which I still possesses (which is of course the most important of the lot), I seems to have lost or had major setbacks in all the rest.... in the space of a month.

Just when I was getting over 1 issue, picking myself up & getting my piorities sorted out.. rarring to go charging into the world & claiming myself a huge slice of the money-pie... a bomb just dropped.

Suddenly seem to have lost one of my legs...

At times, I really feel so damn fuckin tired. Just wanna let it all go & enjoy my free time & life...

However, deep down I know stopping or turning back is not an option (is not 1 I can afford or allow anyway). I will definitely, surely but slowly pick myself up & carry on..

Although limping.. it's still better than standing there or sitting down.

I shall not give up!! I won't & I MUST succeed!!!! And not only will I continue down this path.. I will emerge stronger, better and tougher!


I MUST!
I MUST!
I MUST!
I MUST!
I MUST!
I MUST!

I MUST OVERCOME ALL THIS SHIT!!!!!!!


Guess what I really really really need now is... strength (Although I really need some support right now, but I've lost that as well.. hiazz.....).


God, help me out here will ya?

My 100th post!














Didn't realise I can actually post 100 entries full of nonsence, craps, complains & whinings.. in just 6 months!

Hahaa..


Well, thanks to all my faithful readers.. U guys & gals gave me the motivation & the energy to write on...


Thanks to my web counter... here's a tribute to all my readers from the following countries... (in alphabetical order..)



  1. Argentina
  2. Australia
  3. Barbados
  4. Brazil
  5. Canada
  6. Chile
  7. Estonia
  8. France
  9. Germany
  10. Hong Kong
  11. India
  12. Israel
  13. Italy
  14. Japan
  15. Philippines
  16. Malaysia
  17. Mexico
  18. New Zealand
  19. Republic of Korea
  20. Spain
  21. Singapore
  22. Taiwan
  23. Trinidad
  24. Tobago
  25. United Arab Emirates
  26. United Kingdom
  27. United States of America
  28. Ukraine


    Wow.. it's a mini UN here! hehee.. anyway folks, thanks for dropping by often especially u guys from US, Australia, HK & UK.. appreciate your daily visits! Drop me a line sometimes, ya?

Oh God, look at the time.. its lunch time! hahaa..